Monthly Archives: April 2015

Ain’t to Proud to Beg……

Depending on when you grew up, “Ain’t to Proud to Beg” was either sung by The Temptations or TLC. But for me, it’s a lesson in not being too proud to ask for help.

Somewhere along line, asking for help became a sign of weakness. Something that someone could use against you in a promotion, meeting, class, or conversation. On the flip side, a lot of people (myself include) are too proud to ask for help because that will let the world know that we are not perfect.

I was really struggling with what to write about this week besides my Sunday #singlegirproblems post. I know that I want to cover Broad Street at some point, but I was absolutely stuck.

So I did the unthinkable. I asked for help. I posted on Facebook that I have absolutely no idea what to write about. Can you give me some ideas. And you know what???? People responded. I got great ideas for future posts and thanks to a Sorority sister, I have 260 blog posts ideas as well and an amazing source of information about how to make this blog awesome.

But what would have happened if I didn’t ask for help? I would probably be sitting here wasting time thinking about what to write. The simple action of reaching out inspired this very post!

Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of strength. It shows that you are strong enough to know when to admit that “Hey, I’m not perfect, I don’t know anything and that’s OK” And if someone gives you grief about it, they are probably upset with themselves because they couldn’t do the same thing. Asking for help also gives you an opportunity to learn and grow. And if you stop growing and learning, than you’re just being. And what fun is that??

The next time you are stuck and don’t know something, take a deep breath and ask for help. You’ll be amazed at the response. And on the other hand, if someone asks you a question, don’t make them walk across the Sahara for the answer. Freely give the information (if you have it) without restrictions. You don’t want to be “That person.”

Because I asked. you have this insightful blog post!

Later Days!

B

#singlegirlproblems

****** Graphic Language Below***** You have been warned…

Here’s a message I received last week:

Scorpio76r: You are very beautiful
Me: Thank you
Scorpio76r: My pleasure, have a blessed evening
Me: You too
Scorpio76r: Thanks, if you ever need a friend… I’m here.


Is it me, or is this guy just looking for a fuck buddy? I could be reading way too much into this but that is the creepy, nasty vibe that is oozing from this message that makes me want to drown myself in bleach and Lysol.

Seriously, who randomly reaches out to a perfect stranger and just says “you’re beautiful”. Who does that???  SMDH at the things that people do. I know that I sound like a broken record, but I can’t wrap my head around humans sometimes. And since he has the balls to send this message to me, he obviously has sent similar messages to other women possibly with different results. Or maybe I can’t take a compliment…. I need therapy….

What are we teaching or not teaching our girls about relationships? That all a guy has to say is you’re beautiful and that gives him permission to get in your pants?  Have our standards for ourselves been lowered so much that the slightest bit of fake affection means that we should take this man as our husband?? Or have we not loved them enough as children that any sign of affection is rewarded. If you have a young girl in your life, please give them a hug right now. Thank you.

And are we, as women so desperate for a relationship that we will fall for this horrible attempt at a pick up line? I would not have normally responded to messages like this (I do have a blog to write). If you can’t put in the effort for at least 3 sentences, then I won’t waste my time with you because what else are you not going to work at, a relationship? Point to ponder.

When it comes down to it, we must set up boundaries and priorities for what we will and will not tolerate in a relationship. That’s it! It’s like the quote says, Keep your standards and your heels high!”

And judging by the height of my standards, I may be single for a while.

Later Days

B

Fitness At Your Fingertips

Just when I think that Beachbody has it all figured out….. they reinvent the game. Beachbody recently introduced it’s Beachbody on Demand platform. Think Hulu and Netflix for Beachbody Programs. What the fudge!

Of course, I was a Beachbody junkie before, but this…. this is a total game changer.. I have been wanting to try some “older” programs for a while (hey Hip Hop Abs) and now I can. Here is the current list of available programs:

  • Hip Hop Abs
  • Insanity
  • Insanity: The Asylum Vol 1 and 2
  • Chalene Extreme
  • Turbo Fire
  • The Complete P90X series (P90X, P90X2, P90X3, P90X one on one: Vol 1 and 2)
  • 10 Minute Trainer
  • Brazilian Butt Lift
  • Rev Abs
  • Tai Cheng

And on top of all that… you can preview newer workouts, such as PiYo, T25, Insanity Max 30, Body Beast, Slim in 6, 21 Day Fix and 21 Day Fix Extreme. More programs are being added all the time. In fact, 6 additional programs will be added in May, bringing the total value of content to over $3,000.00. All available on any Wi-Fi enabled device (computer, phone, iPad). No DVDs necessary.

Oh wait, there’s more. If you have ever purchased a Beachbody program, it will be added to your program list in the near future! I can now stream T25 and 21 Day Fix while on vacation. How awesome is that.

Now fitness is truly at your fingertips! All of these programs for less than the cost of an annual gym membership!

Interested in learning more about Beachbody on Demand? Send me quick note at bshart@gmail.com and I’ll be happy to answer any questions!

Later Days

B

Broad Street Bound

Today was a good day I say as I stuff my face full of Chipotle (veggie salad. I did splurge on guac and chips). Today I finished my longest run for Broad Street training. It was supposed to be 8 miles, but we’ll get into what happened later.

The Kelly Drive loop (Boathouse Row/MLK Drive) is perfect for an 8 mile run. Already measured out and you get to see both sides of the river. Just start running and you’re golden. This would have been perfect if there wasn’t a walk on MLK Drive and a high school regatta on Kelly Drive. What is a girl to do when her favorite running path is congested???? Run the other way! Instead of getting all worked up and bent out of shape, I just ran in a different direction. Seriously, instead of going right, I went left.

I stretched, turned on my Nike+ GPS watch and started running. And what a glorious run. Behind the Art Museum, past 30th Street Station and out on the river. There is a stretch of the path that actually goes out onto the River. Honestly, that was my favorite part of the run. But what I wasn’t expecting was a dead end. At the end of the path, there was no where else to go. Well I could have gone up the steps and continued to run on the street, but I wasn’t feeling it. So I turned around and went back. Which put me right on Kelly Drive and in the middle of the high school regatta.

Now, I am not a “social” runner. Those that just jog to jog. There is nothing against that, but it’s not me. I’m out there to train. Go hard or go home dammit. I could have gotten mad (and I did) or I could use these slight traffic jams for intervals. So that’s what I did. I would sprint past people until the path was clear in front of me and then slow down to my pace, and when that didn’t work, I moved off the path and onto the road (literally). Thanks to the above mentioned regatta, a pretty good section of the Drive was closed to traffoc. So much better for my sanity and endurance.

Now, why was my run 9.14 miles instead of 8 you ask? Because I suck at math. By the time I got on the Drive, I was already about 5 and 1/2 miles in. So, I figured if I turn around at the 2 1/4 mark, I would be good. My watch proved me wrong. Now, I could have stopped when my watch said 8. That would have been ok. But why stop. I was feeling good, so I decided to keep going. I’ll be running 10 miles in a couple of weeks,so what was the big deal. There wasn’t one. It’s easy to stop when you are supposed to, but it takes mental toughness to go the extra mile. Or in my case, 1.4 miles.

Sometimes you have to do a little more work, stay late at work, or do a few more reps to make yourself better. Change doesn’t have to happen all at once. It can build up over time by doing little things.What did I learn for this longer than anticipated run, I am well on my way to accomplishing my goal of running Broad Street in under 2 hours and it pays to be flexible. When you can’t go right, go left!

Besides, who would want to leave a view like this:

Later Days Peeps!
B

 

#singlegirlproblems

In the continuing saga of Bianca Finds A Boo, we delve into just how easy it is for one to be completely turned off, shocked, amazed and floored by exactly how much men are willing to share in an initial message. I mean, these guys don’t know me from Eve yet they are completely comfortable with sharing chapter and verse about their life.

Take this little nugget for instance:

Good Afternoon, I enjoyed reading your profile so I thought I would stop by and say hello. My name is Tony and I would like to make your acquaintance. I have been divorced for 4 years. I am employed in the Finance and Insurance Industry doing Financial and Retirement Planning, I have a lot of interests of which some are going to the movies, dining out shooting pool, the beach and sports to name a few. I don’t drink, smoke or do drugs. I live alone and I have no drama in my life. I have a daughter who is on her own. If you are interested or if there is anything else you would like to know please ask me. By the way, your eyes could light up a room. ~optomistik47

Hold please Tony and have all of the seats. First there is nothing else for me to know. He told me everything in this paragraph. And judging by his age (48) and the fact that his daughter is out the house, I think that I have more in common with her than Tony. And I know that at my age, I will possibly date a man that has a child/children from a previous relationship, but I would much rather watch Doc McStuffins or Paw Patrol than discuss the break up of One Direction or last week’s episode of Scandal with my boyfriend’s child. But that’s just me.

And when did it become mandatory to include the “I’m clean” line in the initial message? While I appreciate him being forthcoming with this information, I would have preferred to have had that discussion in message #3 or 4 when there was a potential for us to meet in person. Oh and thanks for the compliment, but by the time I got “your eyes could light up a room,” I had already decided that Tony would never see my eyes in person. Has dating changed that much that men just say whatever from the jump and expect to go out with a woman? I know and take pride in the fact that I am somewhat (very) conservative when it comes to relationships, but what happened to easing into things over multiple conversations and then deciding to go out on a date? Have we become so accustomed to immediate gratification that if it takes more that one message to set up a date than we are no longer interested. Am I destined to spend my Friday nights at home with the dog doing laundry and writing blogs because I need more than a paragraph to figure out if a guy is worth going out with (i.e . not crazy, married, or serial killer)

Here is another goody:


Your profile piqued my curiosity, Twigz. It’s refreshing to see someone with some individuality and experience working in public housing (I do as well). Bonus Points for liking running. Oh wait, you like Chinese food? Bonus points revoked immediately!
~MtAirySoul

I can’t even…  Seriously dude. Are you freaking kidding me? Who does this? Let’s start with the username (as I type this, he has deactivated his account) No, let’s just move on. I will stop racking my brain over than one. And there will be an entire post based on how you can tell a lot about a person from their username. If this was an attempt at humor it did not work. Like epic fail. Like, wow. You really thought I would reply to that mess? Where’s my wine? My bonus points would probably be revoked for needing alcohol to forget that message.

Anyone else with #singlegirlproblems? Any other dating topics that you would like to me cover? Just let me know.

Later Days!

B

Ladies Who Lift

I always remember that I love lifting when I start to lift again after taking a break. Insanity Max 30 focuses on using your body weight (think push-ups, planks, and tricep dips) to build muscle, which don’t get me wrong, is amazing and did tone my arms and legs quite a bit, but there is just something about picking up some free weights and doing bicep curls and sqauts that does my body (and booty) good.

“Stop lifting weights. You’re going to turn into a man”, says my mom. No Mother. I will not all of a sudden turn into a Mr. Olympia contestant. Contrary to popular belief, women will not “bulk up” if they lift weights. Strength training will actually give you lean, slender and defined muscles (think Michelle Obama arms), so don’t be afraid to lift! Although, my summer work pants from last year no longer fit due to my current “quadzilla situation”( I am no longer a size petite in the thigh area).

Women, by being women, do not have testosterone, and therefore will not bulk up (myth busted). But there is a certain strength that comes from within when you push through a drop set of weighted Bulgarian squats that makes you feel like you can conquer the world. Go on, give it a try. You may thank me or hate my guts afterward.

I was having trouble deciding which Beachbody program to do while training for the Broad Street Run. My race training plan is pretty simple. Run three days a week (long run on Saturdays), cross train 2 days, and have 2 rest days. Well, let’s just say those rest days turned into cross training days, just because I can’t take that many days off (#teamnodaysoff). Strength training is very popular in the running community because increased muscle mass= faster running and more endurance. Just what every runner wants. Sign me up.

I had been looking at the 21 Day Fix Extreme since it was released in February or March and was sold. I had tremendous results with the original program and since I had just finished Max 30, I could handle the challenge and I would be lifting again and still working out only 30 minutes a day. Score!

I was not ready… and thanks to Beachbody on Demand, I was able to start the program before my DVDs came in the mail. Amazeballs. On deck for Monday…Plyo Fix Extreme. The back story, Plyo and I are not friends. In fact, we are not even aquaintances. I don’t know if I am uber uncoordinated or jumping and my knees don’t have a good working relationship, but everytime I hear the world Plyo, I cringe. But with any journey, you have to do things that you don’t want to so I sucked it up and pressed play. The modifier was jumping. Hold please. Smaller jumps, but she was still jumping. Autumn does not mess around.

 My only saving grace is that Monday is Plyo day so at least I get it out of the way. I will admit, the moves are getting easier to do, but I will not be getting any air like Michael Jordan on my squat jumps.Oh and if Plyo wasn’t enough Wednesday is Pilates… with resistance bands day. Crazy town. Pilates alone gets my butt and abs buring so just think what adding extra resistance does.

For my first round, I used 5 and 8lbs weights, which worked in the begining, but last week I felt like I wasn’t getting a “good” workout. So this week I deceided to increase my weight… which increased the sweat factor! I am actually excited to see what the increase in weight will do.

But that’s not all folks…. the 21 day Fix Extreme also comes with these awesome color-coded containers so you know exactly how much of each food group (protein, carbs, fruits, veggies, healthy fats, and oils) to eat eah day. This is a total game changer. Fitness and nutrition in one deal, plus the workouts are only 30 minutes and the enitre program is three weeks.

Off to through some weight around.

Later Days!

#singlegirlproblems

I do more than just workout… Shocking I know. And since I am of a certain age and have been single for a while, I decided this year to focus on my relationship status (i.e. start dating again). After countless conversations with my girlfriends about their preferred method of finding eligible bachelors, I decided to give OK Cupid a try. #1 reason…. it’s free and at this point, I need to save my pennies.

After re-activating a profile from 6 years ago, and updating to increase my age preferences, I was shocked by how quickly people were liking my profile. Either this is the Instagram of dating sites or guys are actually taking the time to read my profile and found me somewhat interesting. This may be easier than I thought. After a couple of messages back and forth with one guy, and weeding out the upfront crazies and weirdos, I went on my first date in years. One word…. Awkward.

Seriously, I was throwing softball questions, you know first date questions like, “what do you like to do on the weekends?” “Where do you work?” This guys hits back with, “Where do you see yourself in five years?” Really dude? Really? Serious dude? Are you freaking kidding me right now? (insert mental face plant here) We have only known each other for approximately 30 minutes and you want to know my five year plan???  I don’t know what I am going to do five days from now, let alone five months, but from this line of questioning, my five year plan will not include you….

And just for shits and giggles and at this point I had already finished one glass of wine, I decided to dig deeper. “So, just how many questions do you have? ” His calm response…. 30. Now this date has turned into an interrogation scene from the First 48 and I am trying to make it out in one piece. I did, and have not heard from Mr. 30 Questions since. He was a nice guy don’t get me wrong, but we were not in the same place. It was obvious that he was looking for an instant wife, while I was hoping the first date went well enough to warrant a second one.

Although there was no love connection, it was definitely a learning experience. At least I know now that you really can’t prepare for a first date, you have to see where it takes you and roll with the punches, or the 20-30 questions that may be thrown at you!

I’ll be updating my quest for a relationship or as I like to call it, “Bianca Finds a Boo.”

Later Days Peeps